I'm writing again. Three days in a row now. I'm not burning up the keyboard or anything, but it's progress. And I had a major plot point jump into my head yesterday, so I'm feeling pretty good about what lies ahead.
As you all know, it's been a rough year writing-wise. And it seemed like the longer I went without writing, the less I felt like I could write. Sunday broke that all apart. Here's what I did...
I told myself to stop listening to the negative voices. And there were a lot of them.
- the reviewer who thought Jo was too whiny in In Deep Wish... can't have whiny... is Jeni too whiny? SHUT UP
- the reviewer who hated all the characters in Accidental Death... can't have people hating my characters... is Jeni too hateable? SHUT UP
- the editor* telling me I have too much backstory in the beginning and a character did this in chapter one but did something the opposite in chapter two... gotta have continuity... SHUT UP
- the editor telling me I am using too many thats or justs or evens. SHUT UP
- the marketing whiz whispering to me Sleeping Ugly isn't selling so why am I writing a third book? SHUT UP
- the agents rejecting me for whatever reasons... (yes, it goes back that far). SHUT UP
- the little voice reminding me that I haven't finished editing Ugly and the Beast, so what the hell am I doing writing the next book? I have to finish editing before I start new words. SHUT UP
- the accountant shouting that I don't have the money to publish anything right now. SHUT UP
Once I got them all to shut the hell up, I went through what I had already written on CU and then started writing where I left off.
Is it any good? Who the hell cares? If the beginning sucks, I'll rewrite it. LATER. Right now, I'm writing new words. Editing is for later. Is Jeni whiny? Hell, yeah, but who cares? Will people hate her? Probably, but who cares?
All those voices are doing is stopping me from doing my job. My job is writing. I get weird when I don't write. (Well, weirder.) So, I need to stop worrying about every little freakin' thing and write the damn book. Any worries that might actually be legitimate can be dealt with after I finish the damn book.
So, that's where I am right now. Writing the damn book. I'm at 6500 words. Like I said, not burning up the keyboard, but it's progress and I haven't really made any progress in months.
*No offense to my editor, but I do not need her in my head when I'm writing a first draft.
Good for you! I wish I had voices jabbering at me so I could tell them to shut up. I don't even have crickets. I have no energy and less finances with a heaping dose of depression (for a freaking year now!) and none of my usual fail-safes have worked. I need to just get over myself. Try something different because that whole insanity thing. You know the one, right? Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
ReplyDeleteI'm proud of you. Now go get a few words written today. I'm trying something different and then I hope to get some words of my own written.
:hugs:
DeleteThanks. I actually didn't get anything written yesterday, but that's okay. I'm totally not going to kick myself over missing a day anymore. Today is a whole new day and I will write today.
Yay for new words! Hooray for the strength to ignore the negative distractions!
ReplyDeleteNow back to work. I need a new Sanderson fix. :-)
Thanks, Deb. Some days ignoring the negative is easier than others.
DeleteLOL, I'm working on it.
Saw this retweeted on Twitter and thought of you. (And me.) Something we both need to remember!
ReplyDelete"Your 5 Star read is someone else’s DNF, and most people’s “oh I’ve never heard of that”.
Read what you like; write what you love. That’s about all you can control." ~Alex London @ca_london
Exactly. Thanks for the reminder, Silver!
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