Over the weekend, I was watching an old episode of Extreme Weight Loss. There was this guy who was really struggling with his food addiction. So much so that he is the only contestant in the history of the show to not make it to the final weigh-in. At 9 months, he'd gained back 60 pounds and the trainer dude gave up. Unable to provide any further support in this guy's weight loss journey, the trainer recommended the guy check himself into rehab. Which he did. After the show was over, I went online to see if there were any updates on this guy, but no.
One of the things that struck me was the idea that no one could help this guy but himself. And he wasn't in a place where he understood that basic fact. He wanted everyone else to help him. And then while they were trying to help him, he did everything he could to undercut what they were doing. It was a mess.
And I started thinking. In fact, the above idea kept echoing in my head - no one can help you but yourself. You can have all sorts of support around you, but none of it will work if you aren't willing to help yourself. You can have no support whatsoever, though, and still accomplish your goals if you are willing to help yourself.
So, last night, I set about helping myself. I sat my ass down and started working again. Got through a page and half of edits.
Then, I went for a hard-target walk.
Tonight will be more of the same. Well, edits anyway. I might take today off walking and do something else active - like cleaning or yardwork.
Because writing and getting more active are on me and me alone.
Sure, it's easier to sit and read or watch TV. When I'm sitting around, I have no urge to tear my hair out over a phrase I can't seem to get right. There's no burning muscles. There's just peace and comfort. Well, that's ain't getting the job done. Life wasn't meant to be easy. Easy is for when the job is done.
Is this newfound gumption going to stick around? Time will tell. But I can tell you one thing, I'm going to try and keep at this every day for as long as it takes.