Sunday, March 24, 2013

Lucky Sevens Sunday Snippet - RTL - pg 7 (and part of 6)

This morning I decided to post a bit of the book I was too afraid to post last week.  The book is called 'The Right to Life', and I'm sure you can guess what the major topic that had me so afraid was.

RTL is set in the not-so-distant future, where abortion has become a capital crime.  The MC is headed home from the doctor's office where she not only found out she was pregnant, but that she must've been drugged and then raped.



Rachel Lind never thought about the women who were forced to keep their virginity or keep a baby they never wanted.  She was above all that.  She just shrugged and figured if they couldn’t practice self-control, it wasn’t her problem.  Rape was just a rising statistic that the politicians said was exaggerated by the anti-lifers.  They said most of the women who claimed rape were just those kinds of women who wanted to be able to break the law and get away with it.  She thought rape just didn’t happen in America. 
Until it happened to her.
When a bus filled almost to capacity pulled to a stop in front of her, she debated waiting for the next, but she knew every bus would be packed with people.  Resigned to her fate, she slowly walked up the steps.  With not a seat to be found, she pressed herself through the dank bodies wrapped in their winter gear.  Near the back was a small space between two rotund men, one of whom smelled strongly of sweat.  She couldn’t tell which.  Maybe it was both.
Hours before she’d ridden a bus just like the one she was currently trapped on, and hadn’t noticed the people surrounding her.  Their eyes weren’t on her then.  Their bodies hadn’t rubbed obscenely against her own.  Now she could see and feel and smell every one of them, and the bile rose in her throat.  She stood so still her muscles begged for release, and she wished for the ride to be over, all the while longing to scream.  When the bus shifted, causing something to brush up against the backs of her legs, she nearly did. 
“You’re being silly,” she told herself.  But the words didn’t help.  “No one can hurt you here,” she mumbled.  But she’d thought no one could hurt her before. 
She’d been so wrong.
Finally, her neighborhood swung into view and she scrambled through the crush to escape.  In her haste, she knocked over an old man’s parcels.  He shouted hoarsely after her.  Any other day, she would’ve stopped to apologize; she would’ve helped him gather his belongings even if it meant missing her stop.  Instead she pushed harder to get away, loathing the thought so polite a gesture would mean another ten minutes of torture.
Only the crisp January air could calm her, and she would do anything to get to it.
When she managed to break free, scurrying down the steps into the dingy snow, the bands of fear loosened enough for her to begin her march home.  As she passed the Italian restaurant on the corner, patrons came strolling out and the smell rolled out with them.  Her stomach rolled in answer to it.  Any other day, she loved the smell of garlic and oregano and tomatoes being slowly cooked to perfection.  The thing inside her was ruining her senses, as much as it was ruining her life. 


Hope you enjoyed the writing.  I recognize that it's kind of rough, but I've grown a lot as a writer since I finished this novel.  If you're interested in playing along with Lucky Sevens Sunday Snippet, just find a page ending in 7 and post all or part of it to your blog.  Please make sure you come back and let me know so I can link to you.  And it would be awesome if you would link back.

As always, please remember that this blog is moderated.  If you have nasty, snotty, or just generally unpleasant comments to leave - they will not post to the site, so don't bother.  I will delete them after giving them to consideration they deserve. 

7 comments:

  1. You're right. This is VERY good writing. And isn't speculative fiction supposed to push boundaries? Well done, B.E.!

    Sadly, no time to play today. I had one of those nights but in the periods of insomnia I fit some puzzle pieces together on my WIP. I'm off to write!

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  2. Thanks, Silver!

    Sorry you don't have time to play today, but I understand. You're a busy gal. Go fit those pieces together. At least insomnia is good for something every once in a while.

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  3. I thought it was very well written! And I agree with Silver-- speculative fiction is supposed to push boundaries. I think it's supposed to raise questions and make you uncomfortable, and it's supposed to make you stop and really think. I believe you did that with this snippet, so good job! =)

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  4. Wasn't around the Interwebs yesterday, so I missed this. So glad you decided to post it, B.E. - and to share with us RTL. A great premise and a great snippet1 I'm with Silver and Natalie - pushing the boundaries is the definition of speculative fiction. So push away, my friend!

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  5. Missed this yesterday. It's obvious you worked hard on this, you should be proud!

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  6. Nice!
    Missing out on the Sunday snippets, but just posted one a few minutes ago. So either I'm really early, or really late. Whichever.

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